Let’s find some linguistic common ground, shall we?
Since this is the introductory post about this sort of thing, it will be a vastly-oversimplified explanation. But it will be a start. (Consider this to be our version of Spanish 101, where you haven’t learned there such a thing as subjunctive case yet. It exists, but you don’t need it to learn how to say, “Where is the library?”, so it can wait a bit. In that way, these are oversimplifications, but let’s get the groundwork laid first.)
GENDER IDENTITY
Gender identity is the gender you know yourself to be. It’s what you think of yourself as: masculine, feminine, somewhere in-between, genderless, both. For some people, this can change from day to day or moment to moment. For others, it’s an immoveable object.
The idea that there is only male and only female is called the “gender binary”, and it’s a complete myth.
SEX
Sex is the set of our bodies, the net result of our chromosomes and secondary sex characteristics and glands and hormones and genitals. It is, simplistically, what your body is—male, female, intersex, etc.—and it’s not nearly as cut-and-dried as we are taught. There are variations here, too, some from birth and some which occur throughout a person’s life. There are genetic variations, genital variations, glandular variations… Some people say, “your sex is what bits you have between your legs, and there are only two” but this has been proven incorrect time and again.
“Male body” and “female body” and “biologically male” etc are just as simplistic and misguided as, say, the idea that there can be only gay people and only straight people, and that they never stray across those lines. I mean, really, people can be born intersex, which I think should immediately and without hesitation call into question the myth of binary sex.
GENDER PERFORMANCE
Gender performance is how you act out your gender or genders, the complex system of cues and signals used to portray masculine and feminine. I suspect this is what people are more familiar with, and what more people are comfortable with envisioning as a non-binary. The fact is, there aren’t simply “female” ways of being and “male” ways of being. Gender stereotypes are broken at every turn, and they are constantly in flux. Once, women couldn’t wear trousers, and now they do all the time. Victorian infants were associated with pink, and girls with blue. Gender performance rules change over time. These gender stereotypes, gender expectations, also change from culture to culture. And gender performance involves clothing and hairstyle, yes, but it really includes any way in which you outwardly portray your gender. Again, this can be in flux, can be fluid. There are no really good rules here, either; people can perform feminine gender, masculine gender, no gender, all genders, none, something completely new…
SEXUAL ORIENTATION
Sexual orientation, as you probably already know, is complex, and mostly boils down to to whom you are attracted. With whom you want to have sex. We tend to describe it in relativistic terms: heterosexual, or different-sex, or homosexual, or same-sex. However, when you begin to think about it with regards to these other terms, what are they comparing it to? Sex? Gender identity? Gender performance? It becomes a little problematic, doesn’t it?
As such, some people like to use the terms “androphilia” and “gynephilia”. To that extent, they’re less problematic, and more inclusive, but they still leave out people who are non-binary. So, no good answers here, either, but lots of things to think about.
Sexual orientation may or may not also be related to your affectional orientation, or with whom you tend to fall in love; one can be bisexual but homoromantic—for example, a male attracted to male and female, but with a tendency to fall in love only with other men. Or one can be asexual, but heteroromantic. Or, or…
Anyway.
All these facets exist independently of each other, and in almost infinite variety. Diversity is beautiful, eh?
And with all that variety, I think it’s even more important to let people determine for themselves who they are at any given moment, and respect that decision, and treat them as such.
So, with that in place, allow me to mention a few more key terms.
CISGENDER/CISSEXUAL
If neither chromosomes nor genitals nor breasts nor reproductive organs are 100% indicators of what “sex” means, then we need a new way to talk about someone who was, for example, born with the sort of body that made the doctor go “Girl! Smoke a pink cigar!” as well as someone who is comfortable with that assigned gender. “Cisgender” is what I and most people prefer to use to refer to someone who is comfortable with the gender assigned to them at birth. Same for cissexual. If you’re comfortable with the sex assigned to you at birth, you’re probably cissexual. Congrats. You have a label too. Woot.
The prefix “cis” comes to us from chemistry, which in turn came from the Latin <i>cis,</i> meaning, “on the same side.” In chemistry the dichotomy is called “cis/trans isomerism”, which leads us nicely into our next definition.
TRANS* and the TRANS* UMBRELLA
Trans, in Latin, means either “on the other side” or “across”. Unlike “cis”, “trans” is still a popular prefix in English. Transport, trans-atlantic, translate…
“Trans” gets a lot of use for our purposes.
But due to the malleable and evolving state of language, just what this means can get a bit confusing. Follow me, here.
First of all, to say people are “transgender” simply indicates that their gender identity does not correspond to the whole or part of the gender assigned to them at birth. (I’ve heard it termed as “coercively-assigned”, since we’re not really given a choice, or generally asked for our opinions on it as we grow up.)
So what’s trans*?
First of all, the asterisk. In computer-land, when generating a boolean search (read: Googling) an asterisk operates as a wildcard. This means, if you put an asterisk at the end of a word, the computer will return anything with that basic term AND anything with characters after it; e.g., inputing “jack*” will give you results which include “jack” as well as “jackson”, “jackie”, “jackdaw”, etc.
So, “trans*” becomes a fuller, more-encompassing term. It becomes an umbrella term that covers all the people for whom the gender or sex assigned to them at birth is either inaccurate, incomplete, both, or none of the above. Under this umbrella are all sorts of people—people who identify as transgender, genderqueer, genderfluid, queer, two-spirited, agender, etc, etc… Again, this is fundamentally anyone who is not cisgender. It also can be someone who is not cissexual; transsexual people often are under the umbrella, too, although there is a population of transsexual people who wish they weren’t. Please spend some time with Mr. Google if you want to know more about that; I’m not getting into that right here, right now. Personally, I like the idea of a wide-open umbrella, because it gives more space for my next point: The myth of rigidity.
A large, inclusive, trans* umbrella is helpful because at any point in a life, a person could identify as any number of things. Some people start off identifying as genderqueer, and eventually decide that they really are more of a transguy. Some may identify as transgender before their physical transition, then identify as genderfluid and transsexual after their sexual reassignment surgery (SRS). Having the term “trans*” as a wide open umbrella term is useful because it gives flexibility, and lets trans*people have some freedom in how they can identify. Freedom and flexibility in self-identification is important, not only for the critical sense of empowerment and self-determination, but because there are so very many facets to a person’s gender identification, gender performance, sex, and sexual orientation. And as these facets have the ability to change from week to week, day to day, moment to moment, our language needs to reflect that.
The bottom line is, these terms are a snapshot of this place, and this time, and the experience of my research as a trans*person. Others may define things slightly differently based on their peer-group or their region or the accepted definitions when they started learning about all this. And that’s fine. It doesn’t invalidate your own education, or the education in this post. One of the best features of language is also its most frustrating; its ability to change and evolve gives us flexibility, but sometimes also requires just a bit more effort to communicate clearly. The key is to just make sure you’re all working from the same lexicon (or that you at least know what your linguistic differences are), to respect each others’ differences, and learn to roll with any changes as time treks onward.
‘A large, inclusive, trans* umbrella is helpful because at any point in a life, a person could identify as any number of things. Some people start off identifying as genderqueer, and eventually decide that they really are more of a transguy. Some may identify as transgender before their physical transition, then identify as genderfluid and transsexual after their sexual reassignment surgery (SRS). Having the term “trans*” as a wide open umbrella term is useful because it gives flexibility, and lets trans*people have some freedom in how they can identify.’
I think this is one of the things I’ve struggled with fully understanding. It was with the help of people who identified as genderfluid or genderqueer that I began to breakdown my binary mindset. However, I don’t think I’d taken this awareness to the next level in terms of the fluidity and flexibility of identification itself. (Does that make sense?) The lightbulb definitely went off reading this. Thank you, Bran.
Yeah, that makes total sense. Understanding is a progression, after all. And sometimes comprehension takes time, especially when it’s about reforming our mental model for something as entrenched as the binary gender/sex paradigm. I’m glad this helped!
It did very much. Thank you, Bran.
I forgot to ask in my earlier comment about the association of? intersection between? gender performance and the concept of passing. Am I right in thinking the two issues are closely associated? I’ve also seen the word ‘socialisation’ used in the context of this type of discourse, which is something I’m really fuzzy about in terms of understanding.
Are you able to shed any light on the above; that is, within the restrictions of a comment section? Or would that be a topic for another day?
Ohhh all that is not just a can of worms; it’s a bucket.
The very, very short version is that, in a way, gender performance is a large entity, which contains socialisation and “passing” and a whole slew of other things related to the way a person communicates gender through look and action.
I’ll start thinking about that as a blog post for another day.
It’s mindboggling to me (and yet not, grr) that I learned none of this in school at any level…
I know, right? If I’d have known what trans* was when I was in school, I would have been able to transition while I was still young, which would have been ideal.
Thanks for the informative post.
I like your phrase “the myth of rigidity.” I think that each person is constantly evolving in many different aspects of their and that for many, labels have to be fluid. I know I’m not the same person I was just five years ago, so some of the labels I used to define myself are no longer appropriate.
However, it is hard at times to break out of that mindset that has been drilled into us–that regarding gender and identity, people are expected to be one way or another. Obviously, it isn’t that simplistic, and people come in a variety of flavors
Thanks for your post. It has been educational, and I hope you’ll share more.
Thanks!
I, too, find it really interested what the human mind is capable of either ignoring or noticing. Which is to say, most people I know don’t think twice about the concept of someone being an atheist now and not a Christian (new self-identification based on internal revolutions of thought or feeling), or about realising their system cannot tolerate wheat as well as they’d always thought (revelations about the ongoing physicality of our bodies), or about discovering their lifelong loathing of olives was not about taste but texture (new notions of the nuances of personal preference). But it might require a lot of work for them to accept the idea of any of those changes happening to sex, gender, or the identity thereof.
I think the idea of fluidity is very scary for a lot of LGBTQQ people too, because it appears to open us up to attacks from homo- and transphobic people, those who judge, who would make the leap from “fluid” to “choice” and use fluidity as a weapon to say that we’re choosing to be the way we are. But the fact is that language is…just that, language, and words are words, and most of us strive to find the right label for ourselves at any given point in time. We search for the label that signifies what is true, and if that truth changes, then we must necessarily change the label. Identity is mutable, regardless of choice.
This was awesome, thank you. I’ll make sure to spread this link around!
Thanks! Please do.
Very interesting.
Thank you
Thank you for reading.
Wow. I had no idea. What I thought I knew was just expanded tenfold and that’s a good thing. Thank you.
“And with all that variety, I think it’s even more important to let people determine for themselves who they are at any given moment, and respect that decision, and treat them as such.”
Love that.
I’m so glad. Thanks.
Great post! I agree with the “umbrella” idea. I think if people could think more fluidly, a lot of conflicts could be avoided.
I think for those of us who are pretty set in our wiring, it’s hard to truly understand people with more fluid senses of themselves or their attractions. However even if I don’t fully “get it”, I am still of the “to each his own” philosophy. I don’t think everyone has to be like me or like you or like anyone. That fear of anyone different is what fuels so much hatred in the world. Different color, different beliefs, different tastes. Education is the key though and posts like this that inform and can alter someone’s perception even a smidgeon can all add up over time to a more accepting world who doesn’t see the need to put everyone in a box and keep them there forever. Great job.
I think you’re right; after all, being set in wiring is probably just as foreign to me as being fluid would be to someone else. Respect, education, and work toward acceptance are the important parts, not forcing people to be the same. Thanks.
Beautifully written. You said it so much better than I’d be able to manage! (I tend to begin well enough, and become increasingly disturbed and upset when I attempt to write things like this.)
Hey thanks! I’m really glad you enjoyed it. Yeah, I can totally understand emotions getting all swaddled up in this; it’s tough to maintain the right distance. Especially when there’s so much injustice and so many feelings of frustration that get called up when confronting that jarring gap between the way things are and the way so many people think they are.
This such a great post! Thank You ^_^
Pleased you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading.
Great post. Thank you Bran.